My Dad Would Be Proud...Sort of

This morning I remembered that my car had been making a husky sound when I started her, so I wanted to check her oil. Now, let me explain the sort of part first. My dad would not be proud that once again my car had just about no oil in it. And that it takes me this long to figure it out and fill her up with oil again. But, let me tell you the rest of the story.

So I go to my trunk to get oil (which I do have so that's good) and realize that my broken hood prop isn't in the trunk. It must be somewhere in the garage and I don't want to mess with finding it because I've already got the kids buckled in the car ready to run errands. So I try to let the hood rest of my head while I fill the car up but that doesn't work. Then I decide that maybe Luke can help. (What was I thinking?) He does help me by getting a branch for me to use as a makeshift hood prop. So I proceed to fill the oil, all the while missing the too-small funnel and knowing I have to also clean all that up. I finish and clean up the dirty areas with soap and water and am finally ready to leave...at least a half hour later.

There are many places in that story that I think Dad would be proud of. 1) That I had oil. 2) That I made a makeshift hood prop. 3) That I cleaned up the dirty areas with soap and water.

Sidenote: As with most frustrating stories, there was a funny moment. When Luke got out to help me, he must've made the connection between me standing there with the hood up trying to figure something out and a scene from the Transformers movie that has a girl helping with a car. In the movie she says, "Nice headers." So Luke walked up to the open hood and said, "Nice Edwards." Guess that's what he thinks she's saying. He cracks me up!

Laundry Horrors:)

I was dreading going to get this ridiculously large load of laundry, all kids' stuff. But as I was down there getting it I was talking to myself about how I could sit and fold and finally grab some lunch and watch the Golden Girls. That was sounding really nice until something didn't make it into the dryer from the washer. And it wasn't a sock or shirt. It was a sealed up dirty diaper. It had gone through the washer AND the dryer with this enormous amount of the kids' clothes!!! YIKES!
Needless to say I don't have to fold that laundry now because it's washing again. With A LOT of detergent.
Off to hang out with Rose, Dorothy, Blanche, and Sophia now.

This Season...and some ramblings of my heart

Oh how I long for this season to last. Certainly not because I pretty much only shower twice/week. Or because from the time the kids wake up til the time they're asleep it's a constant busyness. Or because I enjoy scheduling around naptime (thank God there is naptime!). Or because I like thinking about how much more money we could have if I would go back to work.

The other day a VERY unlikely person that I work with asked me if having kids was the greatest thing I'd ever done. I shyly replied yes, and that it was also the hardest thing I'd ever done. There was more to the conversation, but right then, it occurred to me that I might be in that place at that time with my momma heart for a reason.

I want it to last because I love being a mom. I always wanted to be a mom, longed for a firstborn with all my heart, cried endless amounts of tears when other people got pregnant easily, and just knew it was what I was supposed to do. That's why it feels so strange to have two beautiful children and the plan to go back to work in 4 years. Is that what I'm looking forward to now? I don't want that to be what I'm looking forward to. Getting up, looking decent, and taking Luke and Norah to school with me so that I can teach twenty kids and bring home a paycheck? Don't get me wrong, I enjoy teaching. When I taught, I built lasting relationships with colleagues, parents, and students. But they helped fill that place in my heart that was just waiting for a baby. I don't think it will be at all the same when I go back. I think it will be good, but not nearly as good as this job I have now.

So on some days at some moments, yes, I want this MOMENT to be over. So I can wash my hair or get my thoughts together. But, this season, no way. I think these days are full of the things we'll talk about the rest of our lives.

Firsts

I was thinking about how much I agree with Kristin about not wanting to forget anything. Not wanting to forget what it feels like to be a momma, to be at home with two kids under three. I tell myself often that this season won't last long and one day I'll be looking back wishing for these days of chaos. I know that's true and try to live my life that way.

Scrapbooking is the way I choose to remember. Keeping up with a scrapbook of Norah's first year and our Life book is challenging but worth it. Already, Luke enjoys looking through it and talking about things he's seen and places we've gone.

Even though Norah's firsts aren't my firsts, they are hers and they are all of ours as a family. Showing Luke how to celebrate with her and encourage her and let her learn on her own is a first. And celebrating with her is as exciting as when Luke first rolled over or got a tooth or took his first steps. Also, Luke is still having his own firsts so those are exciting.

Mom talks about lasts a lot. Like how you don't always know when a last has happened til it's too late. I try to watch for those too:)

Kindred

The word for my relationship with Kristin escapes me. Friend isn't enough. Buddy definitely isn't intimate enough. Sister sounds cliche. Maybe kindred spirit fits.

Kristin and I met in November 1998 and our first excursion together was a square dance. Ha! One of our fondest college memories though.

Our friendship has stretched over states and across streets. It's been long distance and is currently very short distance. We've been single, dating, engaged, married, longing to be a mom, and moms together. Mostly all at the same time of our lives. She's the kind of friend I always needed and didn't have until God planted her in my path in college.

Our personalities are enough alike that we're good at some of the same things and bad at things like change and not getting our way. We can talk about real stuff, scary stuff, God stuff, ordinary stuff, parenting stuff, or not really anything. We cry together, laugh together and play LOTS of games of Settlers together.

For this long friendship I am thankful. I'm glad God has kept us in seasons together and woven our stories together so that each of us is in the other's. It is also a blessing that our husbands are friends, that the 4 of us combined all have friendships with one another and that our kids love each other. That's just going to make the seasons to come even better!